Wine And Palpatations

The Third Way - Accepting the opinion of others



Generally, we are little aware and prepared to accept and integrate critical comments on our person from others. Faced with criticism, we tend to respond aggressively or simply despise and reject it. Why? As its name suggests, criticism is all that puts us in crisis and suggests a change. Why change? The change is perceived as uncomfortable and requires enormous efforts to adapt. Therefore, we tend to not take criticism because:

1. put us in crisis and move negative feelings about ourselves. Accepting criticism is
2. who accept the formula. Sometimes we do not accept criticism because it comes from someone who does not accept. OK
3. criticism, is doing something about it: change behavior, change an attitude, among others.
4. The change creates fear and rejection. Therefore avoided as far as possible.

accept any criticism comes from those who come and integrate one of the most important steps for personal growth. Have sufficient capacity to listen empathically to others, understand their views on us and integrate their suggestions, is an internal security level and growth has not worldwide.


what grounds do not accept the opinion of others?

1. Because we have the belief that no one else knows our innermost being.
2. Because we do not accept ideas for improvement of people who hate or do not fully accept.
3. For simple pride.
4. by defense mechanisms that protect us away from creating a shell of falsehood around us.
5. for fear of self-knowledge. For

grow internally, you need to get in touch with the people around us, asking for constant feedback about our behavior and accept it. Acceptance does not mean agreeing on what they tell us. OK is to listen, allow one or more other people to express freely their opinion about us and act accordingly, as our opinion. We can then accept criticism but disagree with its content and therefore do nothing to change. However, most of the criticisms made us appreciate the people we know in some depth or have its meaning. That's because many times we are not aware of some aspects of our communication to others, which in turn are captured clearly by those around us. So if someone says, you realize that you cry too much when we talk about or discuss on the "X", it is possible that the fact perceptive to realize such an attitude is more accessible to others than oneself.

To accept and integrate the critical comments of others (positive or negative), it is important to listen. Apparently, everyone knows it. In practice, many people have genuine difficulty in doing so. Practice, in contrast, selective listening. That is, unconsciously selected fragments of which are told and not the entire message. Learning to listen best practice for personal development available to any person. Active listening, includes the reformulation of concepts, open questions, the accuracy, paraphrasing, building rapport and empathy, abstracts, among others. It is difficult to negotiate and communicate openly with someone without listening actively to what he says. Living

key "Johari" is one of the recommendations for personal growth that can best enhance our ability to take and integrate critical feed back and comments.

What is the Johari Window?
is a composition of 4 areas that determines the vital space a person about what he knows or knows of herself and others will say they know, also about herself.

FREE AREA Known for others and for ourselves	BLIND AREA Known for others
SECRET AREA Known for ourselves	HIDDEN AREA Unknown for others and for ourselves

La información del área libre es la que yo conozco y los demás también. Quizás mi nombre y mis estudios. La información sobre el área secreta, es la que yo conozco y los demás no, por ejemplo, mi timidez ante los actos sociales. Una información sobre el área ciega, es una información de la que yo no soy consciente y los demás sí, quizás una voz demasiado autoritaria cuando me dirijo a mis colaboradores. Finalmente un área oculta, no es accesible ni por mí ni por los demás, al tratarse de los contenidos inconscientes de la mente. Solamente a través de procedimientos especiales (Análisis de los sueños, psicoterapia, entre others) can come to their content.


Exercises to develop in the Third Way

1. Remember constructive criticism that we have made friends and acquaintances in recent times. Were fundamentals? Will gladly accepted?.
2. Learning to live in "Key Johari." Then reduce their blind spots and secret for the benefit of the free. Practice constantly with people you trust. Join
3. open seminars (team meetings, retreats, etc.), where they can get feed back (feedback) of others. Analyze
4. because we do not accept some improvement reviews or comments that make us pride, fear of change, sense of superiority ... Identifying what our barriers and defense mechanisms.